Need Help

[kim82]

Hello. I was going to post on the other post, but since I'm new I guess I can't.

I have a serious problem. And I really need someone's help. My husband has just got out of the military (12 years) and he feels like he's losing my mind. He DOES NOT have PTSD. He's never been in a life-threatening position or "seen things," which is really rare.

He got out of the military in December, and since then, he really believes that a astroid or comet is going to destroy the earth and it is going to literally be the end of the world. He keep himself busy so he doen't have to think about it. However, there's times I hear him have a crying spell and my husband does not cry.

It's really freaking me out. He's seen 2 psychologists and they don't even ADDRESS the problems that we go there for. My husband has always had OCD and ADHD. However those problems NEVER affected him in a negative way. He thinks that he is "blessed" because he get more done than anyone he knows and has goals and is always finishing and accomplishing things.

The psychologists tell him its because he doesn't go to work. He just needs to go to work or school and he'll be fine. But like I said, they never ADDRESS the problem, or tell him why he feels that way. He doesn't walk around asking odd, depressed, lost, nothing. But it's constantly on his mind and he gets severe anxiety about it at times. I don't know what to do. I really would love some advice.

Thank you so much.

Kim

[malign]

Well, Kim, I'm just a layman, so I'm not going to second-guess the professionals you have seen. But I do wonder, since you say they never "ADDRESS the problem" twice: what would addressing the problem look like to you? After all, perhaps no one will ever know exactly "why he feels that way"; I don't think psychology is that exact a science. But I bet that they can recommend things that can help him feel better. Isn't that enough?

Too, you say he has been diagnosed with both OCD and ADHD, but never had ill effects. But the last 'D' in both of those acronyms stands for 'Disorder', which usually means that it has to be doing you some harm for it even to be recognized. Perhaps your husband isn't seeing the downside to his "blessings"? Or, perhaps they weren't harming him too much in one situation, for instance, while he was in the military, but they've begun to, now that he's a civilian again? I'm sure that big of a life change must take some adjustment.

[ASchwartz]

Hi Malign and Kim,

Malign, excellent observations. Don't put yourself down for being a "layman" because you made excellent and valid observations for Kim and I agree with you.

Kim, I am not sure of what you mean when you say that you and your husband went to two psychologists. The public (everyone) tends to confuse the differences between Psychiatrists, Psychologists and Social Workers. Did your husband see Psychiatrists or two Psychologists?

Psychiatrists are Medical Doctors. They use medications to treat mental problems.

Psychologists are PhDs in clinical psychology. They use assessment tests to evaluate patients and verbal types of psychotherapy to help them solve problems.

In either case, I must admit and agree with malign that, given that your husband has two Disorders, OCD and ADHD that they found nothing wrong. I am not sure that he really saw two psychologists or psychiatrists. Also, it seems apparent to me, from what you report, that he has delusions and possibly hallucinations. In other words, it sounds serious to me.

What about going to a third professional.

Oh, by the way, did your husband go to professionals at the Veterans hospital or Veterans clinic? That could be the problem. They are not always the best. I would suggest going outside the VA system. You will pay more but get more reliable results.

Please let us know.

Allan

[kim82]

First off, I wanted to thank the 2 of you. I thought no one would reply to me or address the issue.

My husband has seen a social worker, and a psychiatrist both at the VA. The social worker basically said, "You need to go back to work. Period." That there was no end of the world and he basically needs to get over it. That really angered me.

The psychiatrist said the same thing. They said, you need to work because his mind is going to unnecessary places and there is no end of the world. Then he started to blame my husband's parents for not putting him on medication before he was 18 and stopped talking about the problems.

It didn't really dawn on me until you said he does consider his disorders "blessings" but they really are disorders. And maybe they are effecting him now. You see, that is awesome feedback and you are adressing his problems. These freaking VA doctors are utterly ridiculous as well. He served 12 years of his LIFE to the military and they can't even help him? Ridiculous.

Do you think maybe he has an anxiety disorder as well? I've been looking online and it says people w/anxiety also feel impeding doom. However, he really does believe we are going to DIE from a METEOR during our life time.

Well, I am definetly goin to call a real psychologist that is OUTSIDE of the VA system. Any other advice or opinions would help me. Thank you so much. You guys totally rock.

[confused30]

It must be really hard fo you, feeling like you can't help. It is just a suggestion and I am no professional but has he had episodes like this before? There is a type of manic depression where you can feel both manic and upset at the same time. The person can also feel like they are important or special. Have a look at some bi polar or manic depresion info it may help.
Good luck.

[finding my way]

Kim82, you might be on to something with the concern over his anxiety level. I've heard that phobias can be a way to anchor "free floating" anxiety. In other words, the person feels high levels of anxiety but is unable to look at or find what's bothering them, so they unconsciously attach it to something that will act as a good general substitute and fixate on that instead of what's really going on for them. It isn't the person's fault. They need help and comfort and safety to sort it out.