allegri
06-04-2008, 12:39 PM
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My standard disclaimer (e.g., diagnosis online is not possible). However, you would seem to display symptoms consistent with antisocial personality disorder and/or something in that spectrum (e.g., narcissism + impulse control problem + anger). Becuase of your young age, this would be diagnosed as Conduct Disorder (http://www.mentalhelp.net/poc/view_doc.php?type=doc&id=506&cn=37) (which is basically what Antisocial PD is called before age 18). Conduct Disorder doesn't always turn into ASPD - only some "graduate" in this way. The likelyhood that someone will graduate to ASPD is higher if their conduct disorder started before age 10 (and also heightened if ADHD is present as a co-occuring problem).
From a depression point of view, there are different flavors of mood disorder. There is an aggitated presentation which may fit you. Depressed mood fits very well with ASPD/Conduct Disorder, by the way.
You are too young and we don't know enough about you to predict what will happen in your future with any precision. Most conduct disorder cases remit such that ASPD is not warrented as a diagnosis when they are adults. However, some will go on to develop ASPD and often also a serious substance abuse condition. the impulsivity associated with the condition often leads to risky behaviors and sometimes to health conditions (like sexually transmitted diseases) that could otherwise be avoided.
FYI - it's fine to talk about violent impulses to a point on this forum (just as it is okay to talk about self-injury and suicide). However, these are all sensitive subjects that need to be aproached with care. We will censor/delete graphic descriptions or depictions of violence, or statements of actual intent to harm another (just as we do for self-injury and suicide). Our policies are described in the FAQ (http://community.mentalhelp.net/faq.php)