My Mom is going downhill fast.

[novemberbaby]

Hello Guys,
This is my first real post and I am not sure if this is where I should post it, but I will give it a try. My Mom is 50 she has bipolar and depression. I and my Brother caught her doing speed. Here is just an long story short:

When my Mom was 27 she had a stroke then she got bit by a mesquito and got Encephalitis. With that came chronic migraines and depression.. Then after 25 years of marriage my father passed away in 02. She was diagnosed BP in 00. After my dad passed things went downhill. We should have all got helo but we didnt. We thought he BP was under control...boy were we wrong. She has to the T the first 3 signs of it. My G-MA and my G-PA ( her mom and dad) passed away in 02/ and the end of 02 pretty much it went my GPA. GMA & MY DAD. IN 07 my Mom started to not take my calls and not let me come over.. she didnt even really want to see me. I found her hanging out with a yonger man thats when I noticed all the things going on. She went through $30 thousand dollars. We had NO idea what she was doing, just recently I would say about 2 months ago she went to the ER for chest pains. They said she had congestive heart failure... That came out of Nowhere. She went to the er again... just on Fri. She got out and I picked her up and she was coming to my house to stay for a couple days till she felt a little better.... well I was looking thru her things to get her some night clothes and out fell Speed.. I had NO IDEA she was using drugs!! She kinda admitting that she has been using over a year.. Now we have her in a ,metal health place to try to get her stable... I am so scared that she is going to get out and cont with the drugs.. I dont know what to do. It is soo hard to deal with... ....... I dont even know what to say. I guess if there is a chance that she can get better ,, maybe thats what I want to hear... I dont know

Help

[novemberbaby]

:( hmmmmm noone has any advice :(:(:(

[mabear]

novemberbaby, sorry for the delay in responding but traffic is sometimes pretty light on the site on weekends.

My questions may sound a bit strange but bear with - who wants her to get well, you or her? All i am saying is that you can not do it for her and even if she is in a mental health facility if she does not make the decision to get better, she will return to her old patterns. I truly hope that she makes a decision to accept all the loving help that you are clearly providing for her. In no way am i saying give up at all either.

She can get better and live a life that she wants to, and with your support i know this is possible. The real question is how to get her to make the decision to live this way.

[novemberbaby]

novemberbaby, sorry for the delay in responding but traffic is sometimes pretty light on the site on weekends.

My questions may sound a bit strange but bear with - who wants her to get well, you or her? All i am saying is that you can not do it for her and even if she is in a mental health facility if she does not make the decision to get better, she will return to her old patterns. I truly hope that she makes a decision to accept all the loving help that you are clearly providing for her. In no way am i saying give up at all either.

She can get better and live a life that she wants to, and with your support i know this is possible. The real question is how to get her to make the decision to live this way.

Thanks.. You know It is mainly my brother and I that want her better. Obviously with the loss of my grandparents and father it is very hard to see my Mom go down this hill. I know my brother and I could not take another loss, i think it is up to us to help her and try to save her. I think right now she is not in a mental state to want to change if that makes sense.. she has ALOT of issues to resolve. I did talk to her last night and she said that she wanted to change... I am scared that she will get sick of it and stop.. Her primary Dr percribes her Methadone, 3 -10mg pills 3 times a day.. ( for her chronic migranes) the Dr at the mental health place said that they want to detox her from her methadone, they said that she is so out of it and they cant work with her until she is clear from that... I know my Mom has a lot of issues between her depression/ and bipolar and all the persribed pills shes on she wouldnt have hope. but I honeslty think if we start to fix those problems we can get her better and once "stable" she will realize that, that is the best thing for her. I know 7 years ago my Mom would have never done speed!! NEVER that is so not her, I think all those issues that were unreasolved lead to this. I start to think where did I go wrong?? How could I have let this happen to our family. I think now it is only me and my brother that can get her the help that she needs. I know if she doesnt want to change than this will not work. and thats what I fear the most! i just hope and pray that she wants this and she wants to change.. we have to take 1 step at a time. she has a lot of issues to fix the depression/ bi polar are the top 2 right now. also getting her off the methadone being that one of methadones side affec ts is depression..:( all i can do is try and hope it works out.. i couldnt bear with lossing her.