Dbt???

[Anguish]

I keep hearing--endlessly--about how people with BPD need to get into therapy with someone expert in DBT.

I want to ask--just how is one supposed to do this?! I live in a small town, I am on SSI and Medicaid (needless to say my income is very limited), and I can only go to the local Mental Health Center--which does not offer DBT or anything like it.

Not only can I not begin to afford DBT, I know of no one nearby who even is trained in it.

Why do people keep telling us "you need DBT" when for so many of us, it is (a) unafforable and (b) unavailable?

What are we supposed to do??

I've tried every medication known to science, I've tried endless therapies, I've been hospitalized 7 or 8 times (since the age of 17, I'm now 53) and nothing has worked!

And no, I have never "denied" my problems. I'm just sick of being labelled with BPD and then excoriated and demonized for having it. And basically being blamed because I don't just "get over it"--as if it's something I do for fun.

I don't have any fun! I wish I was anybody but me!!!

I hate life. I hate BPD.

If I could take a knife and cut out my "defective personality" believe me I would. Even if it meant mutilating myself beyond repair.

P.S. Re: we evil BPD's who inflict nothing but suffering on anyone unfortunate enough to be involved with us--I have terminated every relationship I could. I don't date, I don't get involved with people. So kindly quit implying that everyone with BPD scours the world looking for innocent people to "victimize"! I've been the victim of incessant bullying, name-calling and teasing during childhood which utterly destroyed any self-esteem I ever had--I do not go looking for other people to victimize. I know only too well how it feels.

[Mark]

When we say "DBT is the best therapy for BPD" we are talking about what is the best practical treatment, available to many (but not all) for a particular condition. DBT is widely available so far as psychotherapy is concerned, but not so available as to be accessable to everyone.

For someone like yourself who cannot access such a therapist due to geographic and/or economic conditions, I would suggest reading and exploring therapy and pseudo-therapy resources available online.

There are workbooks such as the one avaialble at http://www.amazon.com/Dialectical-Behavior-Therapy-Workbook-Interpersonal/dp/1572245131 (http://www.amazon.com/Dialectical-Behavior-Therapy-Workbook-Interpersonal/dp/1572245131)which can teach you the fundamentals of DBT.

There are a variety of online therapists available. I'm not in a position to make a recommendation, unfortunately, but it's available. Not all therapists will be able to offer DBT, but you can ask around for someone who can.

There are pseudo-therapy things you can do which are in the DBT spirit. A vital active ingredient of DBT is the learning of self-soothing strategies for helping one's self cope with emotional upset. Meditation and other activities that promote mental control and calmness (like yoga) are taught in many communities, and can also be accessed online (http://www.basicmindfulness.org/). This is not therapy per se, but it can have a similar effect.

the Mental Help Net website offers the Psychological Self-Tools online self-help book (http://www.mentalhelp.net/poc/center_index.php?id=353&cn=353), which has a chapter about changing your moods (http://www.mentalhelp.net/poc/view_doc.php?type=doc&id=9757&cn=353) which may be useful to you. There is a lot of discussion therein about self-soothing activities.

So there are things you can do in the absense of a face-to-face therapist that can help, but since you don't have the active guidence of an actual therapist, these activities are not optimal.