samiam
10-06-2008, 05:04 PM
I have had a rough few years. My job requires me to be gone a lot. I have been married for several years and have a great a great family. The past few year have been especially tough. I lost my mother and father within three months of each other. I spent the time while I was not away on the job in helping them (parents) until they died. My wife & kids never saw me due to the work of taking care of parents and work during the week. She helped as if it were her own parents (she was close to them too). Within months of my parent funeral I was on the road again for a long time due to a high stress job with lots of responsibility. My wife and I are at odds. I think we have been on "go" mode so much that we have not acknowledged our difficulties through this mess and trying to manage all of he external things to our marriage (parents death, job, kids, life). We are working through it, but it is hard to be away for 5 months at a time due to the job. We both want to fix things, but I am a bit of a type "A" sprinkled with some nervous disorder and some OCD (little not a lot). She brought up that I am calling too much..and I am. I am afraid that i will loose her, and she and the kids are all I have. Reality is I think we are fine, but my own fear is eating me and I cannot dump it on her...not good for anyone. I think I have more issues than her. I want to make us better, but I cannot control it like good Type A would like and it is eating me. Unfortunately, I really do not have any friends for an outlet due to my responsibility in my job. Just holding it together day by day and going crazy doing it.:confused: