Pedophilia questions... Please help.

[Dunii]

Ok, let me start off by asking that people please look at this honestly, don't judge me and please don't remove this thread.

I am not sure if I am a pedophile or not, I found this forum by searching out "Am I a Pedophile" on the web for help, I was hoping that I might be able to get a little bit of clarity here.

For approximately the last 6 months I have had a recurring fear of becoming a pedophile, I have seen children on occasion that I think are attractive, however I don't want to have sex with them. I would NEVER attempt to have sex with a child and I don't have sexual fantasies about them. However along those same lines I could fantasize about them, I just have no desire to and don't.

What ultimately triggered these fears was that about 6 months ago I found myself sexually attracted to a 12 year old girl, however I quickly decided that I did not want that life and the feelings seemed to go away. As I said before, I don't fantasize about children (even though I could, I don't desire to and choose not to), nor do I want to have sex with children because I know it is wrong.

My question is this: How do I know if I am a pedophile, I know the definition. What I don't know is if my attraction is sexual or not. If I find a young girl attractive and yet don't want to have sex with her because it is wrong, does that mean the attraction is normal and not sexual? How can I tell?

[ASchwartz]

Hi Dunii,

Welcome to our forum,

Your very description leads me to the idea that you are not a pedophile. The reason I write this is that, if you were a pedophile, you could NOT turn off your sexual feelings. Of course you found a 12 year old attractive. They are attractive, with the full flush of youth on their faces. However, a pedophile is immediately and strongly sexully attracted and with powerful urges and graphic sexual fantasies that they cannot and do not want to resist.

Does this help?

Allan

[Dunii]

Yes, I believe so. I think I'm just being paranoid, I just was looking for the opinion of someone else. Now if I could only shut off the paranoia, I have always struggled with depression and anxiety. I will likely be on some medication for those issues starting next week, hopefully once they come under control my paranoia will go with them. Thank you Allan.