http://community.mentalhelp.net/ The Mental Help Net Community is a place where people can offer and receive support for a variety of mental health/illness, and life issues including Major Depression, Bipolar Disorder, Anxiety Disorders (Panic, Social Anxiety, OCD, PTSD, Phobia), ADHD, Schizophrenia and Psychotic disorders, Personality Disorders, Dissociative Disorders and difficult life issues including Grief and Bereavement, Relationship Difficulties, Self-Esteem problems, and similar concerns en Sat, 21 Nov 2009 05:54:24 GMT vBulletin 60 http://community.mentalhelp.net/images/misc/rss.jpg http://community.mentalhelp.net/ http://community.mentalhelp.net/showthread.php?t=2797&goto=newpost Sat, 21 Nov 2009 02:52:34 GMT I am interested in some fields of work that require physical/ medical examination but i have several scars all over that are obviously self... I am interested in some fields of work that require physical/ medical examination but i have several scars all over that are obviously self inflicted. Most of them are very old with the newest ones being a year/ year and a half old. I read somewhere, i think it was US Dept of Trans, that in the med exam physical signs of mental illness will be looked for. I tried to find this again to quote on this post but haven't yet.
Regardless of whether there are specifications about "physical signs of mental illness" or not, self injury is not considered normal and i'm guessing that any observations made upon examination will go in the notes. So i'm concerned that i will be passed over or rejected for this reason. As in, they will think i'm unstable or whatnot.
Two of the fields i am most interested in is the medical field- EMT, nursing, etc. and what i guess can be called disaster relief- fire dept, FEMA, and the like.
If anyone that has any experience that relates to my inquiry i would really appreciate it.
Thank You ]]> New Members Post Here User99 http://community.mentalhelp.net/showthread.php?t=2797 http://community.mentalhelp.net/showthread.php?t=2796&goto=newpost Sat, 21 Nov 2009 01:59:57 GMT Lately I have been overreacting over the fact that I think I might grow up to be a pedophile. I know there are tons of people who have posts about... Lately I have been overreacting over the fact that I think I might grow up to be a pedophile. I know there are tons of people who have posts about being scared that they are a pedophile but mine is a bit different.

I'm female.
17.
I was abused when I was around 4 or 5 by the boy downstairs. He was one year older than me and also sexually abused his sister who was 3 years younger than me. I told my mother when I was 7 years old and then a few weeks after his younger sister told me that he had 'put his thing in her' and she didnt know why it was wrong. I guess he had been abusing her since she was 2.

My mom called the police right away when I told her and we went down to the police station but they said that since we were both minors you couldnt press chargers from minor to a minor but we still filed out a report. Since then he's moved away. He moved away a few months after I told my mom. My mom told his step-dad (He was a family friend.)

He never penetrated me.
He tried to make me do stuff. Like lick his penis and all of that stuff and at one point I did. But I didnt want to. One time his step-dad picked me up and the boy and I were in the backseat and the boy whispered to me "When we get home...wanna play house." I nodded a little. I was sad. I remember that much and when we got home he said that I was the mom and he was the dad and that his younger sister was our child.

He said that I should put his younger sister to bed. (Her name was Selena) so I did and then he explained to me that "Parents do 'it' at night time." So we were on his top bunk and he began to rub my shoulders and so I rubbed his back. But it felt really weird. I didnt want to do it. I left his house and ran upstairs. It was just really weird. REALLY Weird. It freaked me out till the point where I cried.

I started being sexual when I was in about sixth grade. I used to hump things. I had this big life sized stuffed animal mickey mouse and I used to pretend it was my boyfriend and stuff. All I did was hump it and couch cushions. All I knew was that it made me feel good. I didnt know it was used for people to have sex. I knew what it was but it didnt know that..I dont know. After awhile I threw out the mickey mouse and stopped doing it all together.

When I was in eighth grade I got a babysitting gig. It was the neighbor girl and she was about 2 I was around 13 (?) she was sitting between my legs on the couch and I scooted her up a bit but I felt like I did something wrong. I still do. I feel like I had humped her? I told her mom right away and started crying. She told me that all I did was scoot her up.


I feel like if ANYTHING is between my legs I feel the urge to hump it or something. Awhile ago my dog was sitting on my pubic area and I didnt hump him or anything I think I sub concsiously moved my hips up and down once (I was laying down.) but never full on humped him like you would in sex.

I have been fine since then. I think about being molested everyday but not more than a few minutes. But earlier this month I found this spot on the website, or heard something on tv or something, about how people who are molested or physically abused as a child grow up to be predators. (not always but most cases) This got me very scared. I started thinking about what if I sexually abuse my kids when I get older? What if I just get so lonely? What if I'm that disgusting? and I start to get so worked up about it. When I see kids on the street I dont think:
"Oh look. There is a kid. I want to have sex with him/her" But I think Kid. Predator. Abuse. Sex.

and when it hits the SEX part I get a bit horny. Or like..it's a big rush. But I really dont think it's for the young child part. Because I've never thought about having sex with a kid ever. But sometimes it crosses my mind. Like I'll read the word kid and it was go always from Abuse. To molestation. To sex. and then I think of myself having sex with a kid. Not a specific kid or gender for that matter just sex with a kid.

Theres this website called

Stories.xnxx.com

where they write sex stories and theres archives for stories that deal with incest and an older child having sex with a younger one and a father doing it with his young daughter and all sorts of stuff. I dont think of my molesting my own kid AT ALL. But when I do I get so scared and I think "I dont want to molest ANYONE. thats gross." and it makes me throw up in my mouth. Sometimes I masturbate to those kinds of stories and I wonder if that means theres something wrong in my head. I've never seen pictures of naked children. I did look it up only once out of curiousity to see if it was ACTUALLY kids because I had heard about websites that had thhat but then I closed out before looking at anything, but the anime porn is what I look at sometimes. I usually just look at it through sites like redtube and stuff or whatever. Never look up "anime porn". Gay porno also turns me on. I dont get whats wrong me with.

When I was younger I was obsessed with the fact that I thought I was pregnant because when I put my hand on my belly it felt like something was in there. I realize now it was gas but up until last december I would have hours upon hours of freak outs. It was as far as tellling one of my friends to tell me I wasnt pregnant for it to go away.
my OCD is really bad too. I have to have EVERYTHING in even numbers.
The volume on the tv.
The beeps when I lock my car.
The volume bars on the radio.
The times I wash my hands. (if I wash them and touch the back of the sink I think theyre infected and HAVE to wash them again. I make bets with myself like "If you dont wash your hands again then you will fail all of your classes this semester" Its like punishment and it forces me to wash them again)

This summer I was freaking out about my boyfriend being gay. I was so convinced he was that we got in two big fights over it and kept making him say he wasnt bi or thought of men that way and after that was over I freaked out for a month wondering if I was bi or a lesbian and now this. I do believe it will pass but this is the one thing that I have obsessed over that freaks me out the most. I'm afraid to tell anyone because I dont want to into the nut ward and have the police think I'm a future pedo and lock me up. I immediately asked my mother to set up a therapist appointment and she agreed. I go see her on wednesday and I cant wait to feel better. I have told my mom all about this and she says that she thinks im just over sexed even though I'm a virgin and that I have never abused a kid before so why would I grow up to be one. I dont understand what triggered this either but I dont want to be a pedo. I really dont. I want to be normal and not think about this anymore. It disgusts me.
There was an episode of Degrassi where Jane was abused by her father and for some reason that REALLY intrigued me. I dont get why. My mom says that it intrigues her too and that its one of those story lines that makes people curious as to what others feel. My mom bought the movie trade last year and I watched it twice without her and everytime I see it now I want to puke.
Dakota Fanning was in a movie called hound dog and I had read that she gottten raped so I lookd it up to see if they ACTUALLY showed anything and for that I feel nasty. I also once watched the movie the woodsmen when I was in 6th grade or so and I masturbated to it. But it was cause my mom had cancelled HBO so I had no porn to watch. I just want help. I feel so gross. I feel like what I think is so against the law. That if I told anyone other than my mom or therapist that I will go to the crazy people place. I just need someone to tell me exactly WHATS GOING ON WITH ME. ]]> New Members Post Here OCD queen http://community.mentalhelp.net/showthread.php?t=2796 http://community.mentalhelp.net/showthread.php?t=2795&goto=newpost Sat, 21 Nov 2009 01:17:21 GMT I am posting this so an admin will unblock/ activate my posting ability. Thank You I am posting this so an admin will unblock/ activate my posting ability.
Thank You ]]> New Members Post Here User99 http://community.mentalhelp.net/showthread.php?t=2795 http://community.mentalhelp.net/showthread.php?t=2794&goto=newpost Fri, 20 Nov 2009 18:45:59 GMT I have been taking my medication for a week now. I feel like I am trapped in my body. Other side effects too but this is worse. I also am not... I have been taking my medication for a week now. I feel like I am trapped in my body. Other side effects too but this is worse. I also am not sleeping any better and when I do sleep having nightmares so I don't want to sleep. Is this anxiety or a side affect of the medicine? ]]> New Members Post Here Keirr http://community.mentalhelp.net/showthread.php?t=2794 http://community.mentalhelp.net/showthread.php?t=2792&goto=newpost Fri, 20 Nov 2009 15:40:11 GMT Self-love is self-death, Earth-walkers crawl, Happy ones delight in breath, Gratitude is all. Self-love is self-death,
Earth-walkers crawl,
Happy ones delight in breath,
Gratitude is all. ]]> New Members Post Here Hrothgar http://community.mentalhelp.net/showthread.php?t=2792 http://community.mentalhelp.net/showthread.php?t=2791&goto=newpost Thu, 19 Nov 2009 23:25:31 GMT Hi everyone. I have been lurking about for the past several weeks and decided It was time to introduce myself. I have read many of the threads and my... Hi everyone. I have been lurking about for the past several weeks and decided It was time to introduce myself. I have read many of the threads and my situation is similar to many others with the problem of having a small penis. I have suffered very severe depression my whole life not just from the small penis but the majority stems from being small. My most recent severe breakdown came after I found out that my girlfriend of 13 yrs and 3 children together, has been unfaithful for the last few yrs. The guys she cheated with were like Johnny Holmes. I had suspected things for many yrs and even questioned her. Of course these questions were answered with lies and even accusations of me displacing guilt of infidelity. I loved and trusted her so much that I would believe her lies though in my heart I always knew otherwise. We are separated right now, she has the kids and I have all the bills and worries. We are trying to work through this but I do not know how much more I can handle. I still have thoughts of ending it all everyday. I have spent a few weeks in different psych hospitals in the last few months for several suicide attempts. I can't stop crying. ]]> Small Penis Syndrome Vinwalt http://community.mentalhelp.net/showthread.php?t=2791 http://community.mentalhelp.net/showthread.php?t=2790&goto=newpost Thu, 19 Nov 2009 19:31:14 GMT Every day it is a struggle for me to get things done that need to be done due to having to leave the security of my own home. I hate the idea of... Every day it is a struggle for me to get things done that need to be done due to having to leave the security of my own home. I hate the idea of getting in to a car for the fact that I might wreck and/or die (Amaxophobia- Fear of riding in a car). I remember preferring to walk-up the many flights of stairs rather than endure the panic and fear which would invariably develop while using an elevator. I went into the ice room and was intentionally locked inside by playmates. The darkness and the feeling that I might not be able to get out triggered feelings of panic. Here are some more of my phobieas
Achluophobia- Fear of darkness.
Agoraphobia- Fear of open spaces or of being in crowded, public places like markets. Fear of leaving a safe place.
Agoraphobia- Fear of streets or crossing the street.
Batrachophobia- Fear of amphibians, such as frogs, newts, salamanders
Bogyphobia- Fear of bogeys or the bogeyman.
Chiroptophobia- Fear of bats.
Claustrophobia- Fear of confined spaces.
Cleithrophobia or Cleisiophobia- Fear of being locked in an enclosed place.
Gerascophobia- Fear of growing old.
Glossophobia- Fear of speaking in public or of trying to speak.
Monophobia- Fear of solitude or being alone. ]]> General Support lacyjay87 http://community.mentalhelp.net/showthread.php?t=2790 http://community.mentalhelp.net/showthread.php?t=2789&goto=newpost Thu, 19 Nov 2009 07:56:06 GMT I have BPD, and I have a very hard time keeping my emotions under control. Anymore it feels like the slightest things will set me off into anger or... I have BPD, and I have a very hard time keeping my emotions under control. Anymore it feels like the slightest things will set me off into anger or depression. For example, when I'm washing the dishes and someone forgot to rinse something off (okay, don't get me wrong, I wash dishes twice a day and no one ever rinses things off even after I have asked them repeatedly) or when I have to pick up after the people I live with who absoloutely refuse to pick up after themselves, I get almost uncontrollably angry. I slam things and throw things around. Or I will be fine and some thing or other will fling me into self hating depression just being out in public and comparing myself to other people makes me want to lay down and die. I don't know how to deal with it. I'm constantly mood swinging and making things that much harder for myself. What are some ways to cope with my emotions? How can I calm down? ]]> New Members Post Here zohrane http://community.mentalhelp.net/showthread.php?t=2789 http://community.mentalhelp.net/showthread.php?t=2788&goto=newpost Thu, 19 Nov 2009 05:30:40 GMT ARE WE DEPRESSED OR DO WE HAVE DYSTHYMIA??? tHERE ARE MANY Mind-body techniques TO HELP WITH...]]> ALOT OF PEOPLE ON HERE SAY THEY ARE DEPRESSED AS DO I> ARE WE DEPRESSED OR DO WE HAVE DYSTHYMIA???
tHERE ARE MANY Mind-body techniques TO HELP WITH IT AND ALOT OF GOOD INFO I HAVE PUT DOWN TO DEAL WITH IT

Dysthymia is a mild but chronic form of depression. Dysthymia symptoms usually last for at least two years, and often much longer than that, especially when the condition starts in childhood.

Although the symptoms of dysthymia may be less intense than those of depression, dysthymia can actually affect your life more seriously because it lasts so long. With dysthymia, you may lose interest in normal daily activities, feel hopeless, lack productivity and have a low self-esteem. In general, dysthymia prevents you from living life to its fullest, and your overall quality of life may be low. Dysthymia is also known as dysthymic disorder and sometimes as chronic depression and minor depression.

Symptoms
Signs and symptoms of dysthymia include:

Loss of interest in daily activities
Feeling sad or down
Poor appetite
Overeating
Hopelessness
Sleep problems
Lack of energy
Fatigue
Low self-esteem
Trouble concentrating
Trouble making decisions
Self-criticism
Irritability
Excessive anger
Decreased productivity
Avoiding social activities
Feelings of guilt
Dysthymia symptoms typically come and go over a period of years, and their intensity can change over time, too. But in general, you may find it hard to be upbeat even on happy occasions — you may be characterized as having a gloomy personality.


Causes
It's not known specifically what causes dysthymia. Researchers believe that dysthymia has similar origins as depression, including:

Biochemical. Some evidence from imaging studies indicates that people with depression have physical changes in their brains, and this may be true of dysthymia, too. The significance of these changes is still uncertain but may eventually help pinpoint causes. The naturally occurring brain chemicals called neurotransmitters, which are linked to mood, also may play a role in causing dysthymia.
Genes. Some studies show that depression is more common in people whose biological family members also have the condition, and this also appears to be the case with dysthymia. Researchers are trying to find genes that may contribute to causing dysthymia.
Environment. Again, as with depression, environment may contribute to dysthymia. Environmental causes are situations in your life that are difficult to cope with, such as the loss of a loved one, financial problems and high stress.
Risk factors
Although it's not clear exactly how many people may have dysthymia, evidence suggests that it's more common than is depression. That may be because dysthymia tends to start earlier in life — often in childhood or during the teenage years — and lasts longer than does depression. When dysthymia starts on or before age 21, it's called early-onset dysthymia. When it starts after that, it's called late-onset dysthymia.

Although the precise cause of dysthymia isn't known, researchers have identified certain factors that appear to increase the risk of developing or triggering dysthymia, including:

Having biological relatives with depression
Having biological relatives with dysthymia
Being female
Stressful life events
Having a chronic medical condition
Complications
Complications that dysthymia may cause or be associated with include:

Reduced quality of life
Major depression
Suicidal behavior
Substance abuse
Relationship difficulties
Family conflicts
Social isolation
School and work problems
Decreased productivity

Lifestyle and home remedies
Dysthymia generally isn't an illness that you can treat on your own. But you can do some things for yourself that build on your treatment plan. In addition to professional treatment, follow these lifestyle and self-care steps for dysthymia:


Mind-body techniques are thought to strengthen the communication between your mind and your body. Complementary and alternative medicine practitioners say that these two systems must be in harmony for you to stay healthy or to heal.

Mind-body techniques used to improve dysthymia symptoms can include:

Acupuncture
Yoga
Meditation
Guided imagery
Massage therapy
As with dietary supplements, take care in using these techniques. Although they may pose less of a risk, relying solely on these to treat dysthymia may not be effective enough. If you try mind-body techniques first to treat your dysthymia but your symptoms worsen or don't improve, be sure to consult your health care providers.

Coping and support
Coping with dysthymia can be challenging since it can have such a strong hold on your life. Dysthymia makes it hard to engage in the behavior and activities that may help you feel better. Talk to your doctor or therapist about improving your coping skills, and consider these tips to cope with dysthymia:

Simplify your life. Cut back on obligations when possible, and set reasonable schedules for goals.
Write in a journal to express pain, anger, fear or other emotions.
Read reputable self-help books and consider talking about them to your doctor or therapist.
Don't become isolated. Try to participate in normal activities and get together with family or friends regularly.
Take care of yourself by eating a healthy diet and getting sufficient sleep.
Join a support group for people with depression-related conditions so that you can connect to others facing similar challenges.
Stay focused on your goals. Recovery from dysthymia is an ongoing process. Stay motivated by keeping your recovery goals in mind. Remind yourself that you're responsible for managing your illness and working toward your goals.
Learn relaxation and stress management. Try such stress reduction techniques as meditation, yoga or tai chi.
Structure your time. Plan your day and activities. Try to stay organized. You may find it helpful to make a list of daily tasks.
Prevention
There's no sure way to prevent dysthymia. Because dysthymia often starts in childhood, identifying children at risk of the condition may be of some benefit, though, by encouraging early treatment. Also, taking steps to control stress, to increase your resilience and to boost low self-esteem may help ward off dysthymia symptoms. Friendship and social support, especially in times of crisis, can help you weather rough spells. Also, treatment at the earliest sign of a problem can help prevent dysthymia from worsening. Long-term maintenance treatment also may help prevent a relapse of dysthymia symptoms. ]]> Depression lacyjay87 http://community.mentalhelp.net/showthread.php?t=2788 http://community.mentalhelp.net/showthread.php?t=2787&goto=newpost Thu, 19 Nov 2009 05:05:59 GMT My brother was diagnosed with schizophrenia at the age of 17, he is now 44. Because of the stigma my parents refused him to get hm the meds he... My brother was diagnosed with schizophrenia at the age of 17, he is now 44.
Because of the stigma my parents refused him to get hm the meds he needed. When he became a adult he also refused to take the meds.

Due to his symptions, and behavior I find it very imporssible to have a relationship with him. Part of the reason for my anger is that he refuses to get help and treatment, so it's like he does not care to get better.

I as his youngest sister, try to get along with him, but each time it ends as a screaming match, mostly because I am angry at his condition. I can't help it. I feel horrible for not being able to have a decent sister brother relationship with him. And I am having issues of my own when it comes to illnesses. I have been diagnosed with CPTSD. Complex Post Traumatic Stress Disorder and depression from losing my father and father in law in the past year.

How can I better understand his illness, and help him, rather than be angry at him for somerthing he has no control of. And so I don't have to feel guilty everytime we have a argument.

Are there any good books out there that I can read to better help himself be a better person to him.

I personally am not proud at the way that I am acting, and he sure can't be happy with me either.

Please help me, I love my brother, but you would never know it by the way we get along, or in this case don't get along. ]]> New Members Post Here Hunter http://community.mentalhelp.net/showthread.php?t=2787 http://community.mentalhelp.net/showthread.php?t=2786&goto=newpost Thu, 19 Nov 2009 01:48:55 GMT So I just broke up with my boyfriend of almost a year a few days ago...he is a great person, but we just had some general personality differences,... So I just broke up with my boyfriend of almost a year a few days ago...he is a great person, but we just had some general personality differences, and once I was finally honest with myself, I just wasn't in love with him...we were missing the connection I need to be in love with someone. We had it once, but that was a long time ago, and I couldn't get it back. Anyway, he has two kids that are in elementary school, a boy and a girl. I bonded pretty deeply with the girl...she is part of the reason (ok, ALOT of the reason) that I held on to the relationship with my ex as along as I did. She is the best kid I have ever met...super smart and funny, and much too cute for her own good. I just don't know how to deal with not being able to see her again...actually, it will be REALLY hard not being able to see either of the kids again, but esp. her. I also feel like I let her down, because I know she loved me, too. My ex told me so on many occasions. She also told me that me and her dad should get married one day when it was just us hanging out, too. :( So I want to email her, as I know her father will tell her about us breaking up this weekend, but I am not even sure I should... I am big on closure, but I don't want to upset her. I know she is going to be upset already as it is. I just want to tell her that I love her and that I will miss her and to take care of herself and that she is going to do great, amazing things with her life. I just hate thinking about this, because I can't stop crying.... :( Any thoughts on how to deal with this are appreciated. ]]> General Support http://community.mentalhelp.net/showthread.php?t=2786 http://community.mentalhelp.net/showthread.php?t=2785&goto=newpost Wed, 18 Nov 2009 22:31:17 GMT I have read on line there are books or a guide for bpd and there is new hope for this disorder. Is that true? I have also read it gets better with... I have read on line there are books or a guide for bpd and there is new hope for this disorder. Is that true? I have also read it gets better with age. Is that not true?

I do know the therapy I've had in the past has helped me a lot even though I have more work to do. I am so much better than I used to be and plan on starting to work on it even more now that I understand it better.

Anyone know for sure? ]]> New Members Post Here Tickerpa http://community.mentalhelp.net/showthread.php?t=2785 http://community.mentalhelp.net/showthread.php?t=2784&goto=newpost Wed, 18 Nov 2009 21:57:20 GMT it would be so cool to have more control over your profile, like how much you can write and making it colorful....kind of like a myspace profile with... it would be so cool to have more control over your profile, like how much you can write and making it colorful....kind of like a myspace profile with layout and things..thats the only example i could think of but it would be cool to beable to chage it up and stuff...one again i know this is a help website not a social project...i duno i just think of things and i have to write them down... ]]> Feedback lacyjay87 http://community.mentalhelp.net/showthread.php?t=2784 http://community.mentalhelp.net/showthread.php?t=2783&goto=newpost Wed, 18 Nov 2009 20:36:03 GMT So I really love this site. You can say/ask almost anything and get a response. I have more conversation here than I do any other time/anywhere else.... So I really love this site. You can say/ask almost anything and get a response. I have more conversation here than I do any other time/anywhere else. I think it is amazing...Although I would like to be able to post pictures and automatically chat to the people with in a cretin forum. Choose forum>choose post>chat to the people within that specific post. It would be cool to even have a voice chat set up so people could listen and type or listen and speak. More test and quizzes would be cool. and an online therapy sessions for free with professionals where it could be a group activity...you could have one therapist for every forum....I duno just sounds cool...I guess I’m just looking for some more interaction with the people I have grown to adore on this site! ]]> Feedback lacyjay87 http://community.mentalhelp.net/showthread.php?t=2783 http://community.mentalhelp.net/showthread.php?t=2782&goto=newpost Wed, 18 Nov 2009 19:53:54 GMT How can I move forward if we're stuck in the past??? My girlfriend and I have been together for almost a year and it has been hectic to say the least. We are both stubborn and "never wrong". About five months ago we broke up for the fourth time and the same night we broke up I "hooked up" with my son's mother. I figured that there was no getting back together after a fourth break up but apparently there was. So needless to say we are back together and now she finds it almost impossible to trust me at all. Relationships are based on trust and love and I love this girl with all of my heart but I'm going insane when every week I am questioned as to where I am going and when I'll be back and who am i seeing or even talking to. I have made the decision to not be a part of my sons life so that I can move on with my life with her and I check in with her everywhere i go and i do 99.9% of what she asks me to do but at the end of the day she still tells me never to hurt her after I tell her i won't and because she has a bad feeling she wonders if I'm going to mess up and cheat on her. I want this relationship to work I really really do but I'm not sure if it will. Can someone please help? ]]> New Members Post Here dutchboy189 http://community.mentalhelp.net/showthread.php?t=2782