OK, Finally Optomism

[jessicajane1925]

Wierd how quickly things in my life change, Ok, still realy unwell, But a strand of hope is returning and well I thought I would share coz well its good news and coming from me thats like a major miracle.

Im shortly (hopefully) due to be arrivving in London ( too much travelling and way to much travel sickness) got a transfere to a hospital there and already I feel so much better.

Ok thats it thats my good news, but hey im a Londoner, and well Im coming Home (well to my home town at any rate)

And I actually think despite the travel sickness I may just be ok, once I fully get well again. But hey, Im still alive, which is kinda cool considering how suicidal I have been of late.

and Im kinda genuinly HAPPY !!!!

[GingerSnap]

Sue: It's 6:00 am here and I see your post and think that can't be her So clicked on it, read it, almost fell out my chair (not a good thing for "old" bones) but got my balance, looks like you might have too. Going any place we consider "home" always feels good. I am thinking London might have better staff and such to help you get better? Hope so. I know the difference between providers in the US is like night and day as you move from city to city. So hope to keep hearing good news from you but the next time I read your posts, I'll hang onto the arms so I won't lose my balance. This makes my day my dear. You take care, Cathy

[jessicajane1925]

Kinda tired, but I am relieved, firstly to get out of that last hospital for reasons that were soul destroying, but secondly coz im in London and feel closer to sis. And god I so need her right now.

This hospital is lovely, a palace in comparism to the last. the staff are so kind to me, and wierdly they have smiles on there face, which is so nice to see.

I dont feel so out of place here, there are other patients just like me, and its nice to feel accepted. Im gonna be here for a long while, but the treatment and therapies that I was told briefly about has worked on others, Im kinda scared of the hard work but I am hopeful it will work for me too

Notice my avator ?

ITS MY MAGIC WAND ~ A FRIEND TOLD ME THAT THEY DONT REALLY EXIST, AND THAT THE MAGIC COMES FROM INSIDE YOU.......

Well if that is true, then im twice as lucky, coz this one was in my laptop, So maybe theres a little magic still inside me....................

[malign]

There's a ton of magic inside you, Sue.
Inside all of us.
That's how we do the work that makes the good things come true.

[GingerSnap]

I just like this thread so much that I decided to bump it back to the top. Sue, we are all pulling for you. I know you are sort of in a tunnel now but I am visualizing you steaming out into the light, wand in hand, yelling "I made it, I made it, I made." And, I am standing there saying "What did I tell you, I been waiting here awhile but knew you were coming". My best, Cathy

[existindeath]

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[jessicajane1925]

I kinda like this thread (hmm I guess I would, as I wrote it ), its the happy me, often its hidden behind all the evil. Forgot about this being here (selective memory loss maybe ?) its nice to be reminded that I can still feel lighter, and that it is ok.
Get so caught up in evil and well could it just be that I have some good left in me still ?
oh I dont know really, either way. Just need to try and be a bit more realistic and remember that good things can happen in life and that it isnt always going to be just bad, what the heck am I saying, Im just confussing myself further now. Geez will I ever learn
thanks for the comments everyone,
take care
Jj

ooops Ps, blah de blah de blah blah blah........
I love my magic wand, cant find the magic thats inside me, but kinda still searching